That's Just Crazy Talk

Hello World, Happy April Fools Day! I do hope that everyone out there in the wide world had a cheerful day full of innocent fun on Friday, and did not fall victim to all of the various and sundry pranks, hoaxes, and practical jokes that the day is so justly famous for - or perhaps infamous might be the better term under the circumstances. Tossing around its own brand of practical jokes (haha) (NOT) the local weather has been all over the map, ranging from the bracing 30's to the balmy 70's, with everything from rain, snow, fog, and gale force winds thrown in for good measure. It hasn't stopped the spring flowers, which are no joke, with colorful hyacinths doing a land-office business all around the yard, and not to mention, the sunny yellow forsythia busting out all over besides. Early flowering shrubs and trees have already started to bloom, with the stately magnolia leading the way, and I don't mind saying, ours is one of the stateliest. This past winter must have been just the thing for our Glory of the Snow, which have exploded in every corner of the yard, and while I haven't spotted any blue squill so far, I'm not giving up on them just yet. Earlier in the week, I saw my first dandelion in a parking lot on the way home from work, so we all know what that means. Can rampant alien mutant poison ivy be far behind? I think not, and I'm not fooling. Speaking of fools, alert readers may recall that inauspicious occasion a few weeks ago at church, when the tiny but earnest choir launched into the Anthem by inadvertently singing 2 different verses at the same time - and very much not an improvement, even with the novelty factor in its favor, I dare say. Any normal person would be safe in thinking that something of that sort would be a once-in-a-lifetime mishap that there would be no danger of it ever occurring again in the same church, much less soon after that, heaven knows. Well, it was on Maundy Thursday last week that essentially the same thing happened all over again, only this time, I've got nowhere to hide, because there was no one else to blame but me, try as I might. Somehow I forgot to bring my reading glasses to church for the service, so when the tiny choir (and temporarily reduced to just 3 of us at the time) was singing an Anthem during the Offering, and even though we had rehearsed it previously, I found that without my glasses, and at night in the dim lighting of the Sanctuary, I simply could not read any of the lyrics and was basically just fumbling around and making up my own words as it went along - and much to the detriment of the songwriter's original intent, I don't mind saying. Fortunately the other two stalwarts stuck to the printed page, and didn't allow me to lead them likewise astray with my ad lib (one might justifiably say "Mad Lib") mis-handling of the actual lyrics, and I'm frankly embarrassed to report that the indulgent congregation gave us a very nice round of applause at the end of it all. I suppose they might have just been glad that it was finally over, because I know I certainly was. Of course, we also had an evening service for Good Friday, and the choir also sang, although this time I brought my glasses (YAY) and all 5 of us did a rousing version of the Anthem, to help blot out the memory of the previous night's snafu. I even had Friday off from work, which was a nice change of pace from my temporary job, where they don't close for even the most widely recognized holidays. Also last week, we finally managed to clear some time in our schedule, and squeezed in a belated birthday dinner out at Pizzeria Uno in Yonkers, where we had been before, and glad of it. We found it easy to get to, with plenty of parking, and not a bit crowded on Wednesday night, so it was all good, all around. I stuck with my tried-and-true selections from the 2-for-$12 menu, deep dish macaroni & cheese and baked tortelloni gratinati, which were utterly delectable, and their non-alcoholic Uno Colada was as good as ever and just as welcome. Bill took a chance on their pizza skins, which turned out to be mashed potatoes and cheese baked in a deep dish pizza crust, which actually tasted a lot better than it sounds, believe me. New at the chain now is a little electronic gadget that sits on the table, where you can place an order, request drink refills, play games, and pay your bill when you're ready to leave, and how cool is that! I said to Bill, if it only had music options, like the old tableside juke boxes from way back in the halcyon days of yore, it would really be the complete package. Anyway, it was a happy stop on the birthday caravan, and Bill even went home with left-overs, so there's no denying that a fine time was had by all, and I ought to know. Even better, nobody asked me to sing, since I had forgotten my reading glasses once again, and we all know what that means, heaven knows. Continuing with the birthday caravan on Saturday, we paid a visit to my sister on Long Island, where we enjoyed our mutual March birthdays (and early Easter) with an outstanding spring day that was tailor-made for celebrating. It all started with lunch at Denny's (of course) and there were no complaints on that score, I can assure you. Taking advantage of the glorious weather, we then headed off to Crossroads Farm, where their spectacular spring flowers were a treat for all senses, and way too much to resist - and I have pots of calla lilies to prove it. The farm also sells fresh produce and eggs (and we saw their chickens, so I have no reason to doubt it) as well as honey and jam and homemade pies, plus a variety of other provisions (and a playground to keep the youngsters occupied) so there are plenty of reasons to head their way. From there, we set off for Mill Pond, where the ducks, geese, and dog walkers were out in force, and my intrepid sister was busy counting fish and taking temperatures as part of a monitoring program that she volunteers for. By then it was starting to get dark, so we grabbed some of our favorite Angelo's Pizza, and it was buon appetito and plenty of it. Now, it's true that it would be hard to improve on a day that already included Denny's and Angelo's pizza, but on top of everything else, I admit that I'm always glad to get birthday presents, belated or otherwise, and there was even cake, all of which served to make a perfect day even more special. Garcon, more birthday cake, if you please, and don't spare the sprinkles! And speaking of Easter, alert followers of social media are probably long since aware of this, but it came as a surprise to me that persnickety Christians apparently won't call it that anymore, after all these many centuries - which seems to me late in the game to take offense at something, but let's face it, that never stops some people. Presumably the word "Easter" is based on an old heathen festival celebrating the goddess Ishtar, which they rightly feel is inappropriate for such a holy day in the Christian orthodoxy, and in the throwing-the-baby-out-with-the-bath-water mentality of righteous indignation (where, oh, where is Liberty Valance when you need him???) have given poor Easter the heave-ho right along with the rest of the heathens, and good riddance. Not so fast! No less an authority than Merriam Webster describes the etymology of the term as Old English, from about 500 AD, and I have the feeling that the venerable Merriam Webster was probably around at the time, so they ought to know. Meanwhile, our friends at snopes.com, famous debunkers of urban legends, hoaxes, rumors, and misinformation of all stripes, have this to say on the subject: ======================================================== The name for this holiday comes from much older times whose customs we're now not all that familiar with. Many old religions had a Spring Goddess, a special deity who breathed life back into the world, both by banishing Old Man Winter and by encouraging growing things to grow. She went by many names. The Scandinavians called her Ostra, the Anglo-Saxons Eostre, and those who lived in the region that is now Germany knew her as Eastre. (Contrary to some modern claims, the term "Easter" was not derived from the name of Ishtar, the Assyrian and Babylonian goddess of fertility and sex.) ========================================================== So there you have it, holiday fans, a staunchly respectable Anglo-Saxon tradition can hold its head up high, with scarcely a Babylonian anywhere in sight, and even Liberty Valance has breathed a sigh of relief, I dare say. Now, anyone can tell you that I'm no fan of revisionist history, but for those who still prefer to call it Resurrection Sunday instead, they are welcome to sing its praises to the high heavens, as far as I'm concerned. But before they ask me to sing along, they should make sure I have my reading glasses with me, or I cannot be responsible for the consequences, believe me. Elle