Party Central

Hello World, Top o' the mornin' to ya! Normally, here is where I'd be saying that this is the time for all good souls of the old sod to get their green on, because after all, everyone is Irish on St. Patrick's Day, etc., etc. Not so fast! The plain truth of the matter is that local communities around here have long since been celebrating the saint's special day with parades and activities for weeks already, so that it scarcely qualifies as current events any longer. But that is one of the peculiar charms of movable feasts, and The Holiday Police notwithstanding, I maintain that there is no wrong way to celebrate St. Patrick's Day, from the tail-end of February, to the very doorstep of April, with plenty of green beer to go around. Anyway, something must be working, green beer or not, because there wasn't the annual donnybrook and legal wrangling over the venerable parade in New York City, or even the more recent news frenzy over politicians boycotting the time-worn march for the newer versions that have popped up around the boroughs, whose aim is to include all of the disgruntled groups who felt unwelcomed by the exclusionary policies of the original. I admit that it doesn't really seem like St. Patrick's Day around here without all the usual controversy, but I'm sure this new and improved spirit of peace and harmony would cheer the heart of the good saint, and that's certainly not just a bunch of blarney, believe me. Speaking of movable feasts, last weekend also brought us the random scourge that is Daylight Saving Time, that seems to come earlier and last longer every year, and twice as unwelcome at that. Of course, with a new administration in Washington, there's always the possibility that someone will decide that enough is enough, and do away with the whole tomfoolery altogether, if only for the sake of an aggrieved citizenry struggling with the dreaded time change twice a year. In fact, I heard on the radio about scientific studies that show a pronounced spike in heart attacks and strokes in the two days following the DST switch-over, as well as increased car accidents, a drop in retail sales, adjustment difficulties for farm animals, and general complaints of moodiness, sleep problems, and lower productivity at work. Heck, if this was a drug that the pharmaceutical companies were trying to introduce, with these sorts of side effects, they would be laughed out of the FDA so fast, it would make their heads spin, by golly. And frankly, for anyone who's a farmer with a family history of heart disease and drives a car, I really don't care for their chances all that much. On the other side of the coin, March also brings us some immovable feasts, of which our anniversary is one, and my birthday is another, although I admit that we don't always celebrate them on the actual date in question. We took advantage of our anniversary falling on a Friday to invite our friends to join us at La Villa Brick Oven Pizza & Restaurant for dinner, and it was all that we could have hoped for. Alert readers may recall that we had tried to do this once before with these same friends, only it turned out that we inadvertently went to two different restaurants and waited in vain for the other couple to show up, which was as unsatisfying as it was embarrassing at the time. So for this dinner date, cooler heads prevailed, and we went there in one car, to avoid any unfortunate slip-ups in time, date, or location that plagued our first attempt. Everything worked out much better this time around, and our friends enjoyed their eggplant and lasagna with no complaints. For my birthday the following week, we went to visit my sister on Long Island, and had lunch at Denny's, where they offer a free birthday Grand Slam with no strings attached, and we were all over that like a bad suit. My sister also provided special birthday decorations, and snacks like eclairs and brownies, so the birthday train was definitely firing on all cylinders, as it were. To keep us occupied, she trotted out a small puzzle, and even though it looked simple and only had about 100 pieces, it still managed to thwart our best efforts, and in the end, after much time wasted, we were left with 2 blank spaces and 2 pieces that did not match, thanks not. But it was still a very nice birthday, even with the dinosaurs reminding me, once again, that I am not only older than dirt, but that I was the one who first told Thak that his invention of the wheel was nothing more than a fad that would never catch on. In other local news during the week, we took a hit from Winter Storm Stella, which roared across the country and into our region, dumping deep swaths of snow every which where, up to several feet in some areas. It wasn't that bad here, and I was lucky that the construction company where I'm working now was closed on Tuesday and Wednesday, so I didn't have to try to battle the conditions and get to the office all the way on the other side of the county. Bill works at home, so he had no travel issues, and we were able to free up one of the cars to get out if we needed to. A bigger problem was the continued freezing temperatures, especially overnight, so that even with several days of bright sunshine, there was a notable lack of melting in the piles of snow everywhere. It doesn't seem possible that the first day of spring will be here on Monday, with its age-old promises of flowers, gentle breezes, and better days ahead. At least that's what we're hoping for around here, although I admit that this arresting headline in the local newspaper last week really gave me pause: ============================ New stunt school brings Hollywood flare to New Rochelle ============================ Gee, I sure hope not! Here I'm thinking, about the last thing we need is flares in the Queen City downtown, on top of everything else. Alas, as is all too often the case, the spell-checker is not going to help the poor befuddled headline writer who chooses the incendiary "flare" in the place of the more stylish "flair" in this situation, and changing the tone of the article from the merely interesting, to more alarming levels at a stroke. According to the story, their goal is to train participants how to fall safely, throw a punch or kick for visual effect, use weapons correctly, and engage in fight sequences without getting hurt. There's no mention of how to handle flares, so one can only assume that is not included in the coursework, in spite of the headline's inference to the contrary. So if you've ever harbored a hankering to be involved in a classic bar-room brawl like in the movies, I invite you to check out our friends at Up Against the Wall Stunt School here in town, for all the fist-flying, rough-and-tumble action that you can handle. But please, leave your flares at home. Elle