Snake Charmer

Hello World, Happy Chinese New Year! Don't forget to wish everyone you know a very Hong Kong Bok Choy, and be sure to wear plenty of red for good luck. This is the Year of the Snake, and people born in these years share the qualities of being "mysterious, intuitive, cool and calm. Thoughtful and intellectual, at times they can seem to have almost superhuman insight. They have quick minds, and although they will think things through carefully, they are able to make quick decisions. Snakes can be very wise, and they have an innate sensitivity. They are also very adaptable. They are quiet by nature, and slow to become angry. But although they speak courteously, they can be stubborn and unwilling to admit defeat." (With thanks to our friends at www.your-chinese-culture-guide.com for their input.) So for anyone born in 2013, 2001, 1989, 1977, 1965, 1953, 1941, 1929 or 1917, get on out there and strut your stuff. Or I guess, slither your stuff would be more appropriate under the circumstances. Garcon, more kung pao if you please! So it seems that the Super Bowl turned out to be a wild and woolly affair, as they often don't, and certainly plenty to talk about, between the actual game on the field, the half-time show, the power outage, and of course, those out-of-the-ordinary commercials that people look forward to every year. In the end, the Baltimore Ravens squeaked out with a win, and this was no snoozer, because it went right down to the wire, and it was basically anybody's game right to the end. New Rochelle's own Ray Rice didn't hang around New Orleans waiting for Mardi Gras next week, but came right back up north and thrilled the home-town fans with appearances in his old stomping grounds, such as at the high school and Spectators Pub in the heart of the bustling downtown scene. Now there really is no more football to look forward to, since they already played the Pro Bowl in Hawaii the week before the Super Bowl, and fretful fans will have to make do with basketball, hockey, video games, or just wait until training camps start up again in the summer. Anybody who wants to circulate a petition to revive arena football, to occupy hard-core fans during the off-season, I'll be happy to sign, believe me. Garcon, more buffalo wings and nachos, and I'll have mine with a side order of cheerleaders, if you please! In other sports news, now that the hockey lockout has been resolved, and they're back on the ice once again, we're left with the only other labor dispute of note, which was not only of epic proportions, with far-reaching consequences, but also tragic in outcome on a global scale. Yes, I'm referring to the contract stalemate that shut down the mighty Hostess company, bakers of such beloved snacks as the iconic Twinkies, Ding Dongs, Ho Ho's, Wonder bread, Sno-Balls, cupcakes, Suzy Q's, mini muffins and Donettes. It goes without saying that a world without Twinkies doesn't bear thinking about, and I can tell you from sad and painful experience that off-brand substitutes are no replacement for the original. Even worse, because Hostess had been acquired by the food giant IBC, along with many other tasty brands, this also spelled doom for its sister company, Drakes, and its very own legion of flavorful treats - such as Devil Dogs, Ring Dings, Yodels, Yankee Doodles and their yummy signature coffee cakes. Well, this is a low blow indeed, not to mention a bitter pill to swallow, and for those of us who are life-long fans of these delightful goodies, all I can say is now is the winter of our discontent, and life itself has truly lost all meaning. Garcon, bring on some spilled milk to cry over, and plenty of grapes of wrath whine, if you please! Meanwhile on the local scene, we recently had the Sony expert at our house to install their special audio system that goes along with our new TV set, on the theory that if anything went wrong, at least we would have someone to blame - rather than trying to do it all by ourselves, and then just be stuck with the results, however imperfect. This companion system comes with 4 speakers and a sub-woofer for a surround-sound experience that really makes you sit up and take notice, and is worlds away from even the TV's own stereo speakers, as good as they are. We gave it a trial run with The Avengers in 3-D, which offers enough explosions, music, crashes and dialogue to really put the entire operation through its paces - from the loudest in-your-face alien onslaught to the faintest whisper in the barren darkness - and it all comes at you from every side. Heck, even the commercials are a lot more entertaining, and I can tell you that I have never gotten very excited about paper towels or granola bars before, believe me. For fans of late-night TV, it will come as no surprise when I say, "But wait, there's more!" The new audio system offers a variety of other features as well, for instance, it includes a connection for your iPod, so you can also listen to all of your favorite music in the surround-sound environment of your dreams. There's also a built-in FM radio function, so you can find whatever other music options might be out there in the wide world to suit your fancy, apart from what you may already have on hand. I said to Bill that it's getting to be a real home theater in the old place, and all we need now is cup holders to go along with our comfy seats, because thanks to many decades full of many cats, we already have a sticky floor just like real movie theaters. Garcon, more popcorn and Raisinets, if you please! Elle