A Run For The Money
Hello World,
Just when we thought it was safe to go outside, along comes another Friday the 13th. Although I suppose we shouldn't complain, because not only is this the first one we've had so far in 2005, but it's actually the only one we're going to have in the entire year. So if you're planning to get out there and break mirrors, walk on cracks and cross in front of black cats or under ladders, you'd better hurry off and do it now, while you've still got the chance. They say that time and tide and bad luck wait for no man, or something like that anyway.
Our spring-like weather continues apace around here, and while the days have been nice enough, it's certainly not what anyone would consider too hot by any means. I was prepared to shoulder the responsibility for the unseasonably cool temperatures, because I lost my head and not only took the flannel sheets off the bed, but the electric blanket as well. You can be sure that I won't be making that mistake in April again, because I've been freezing ever since. However, I have recently heard from someone who certainly should have known better (in fact, it was my sister Linda, who has brains as well as good looks) and nonetheless spent the weekend packing away winter clothes and taking out summer clothes. I don't know about where you are, but in this area, I'd say we should be prepared for another Ice Age to unceremoniously descend upon us.
Last week, we were treated to the unusual spectacle of a long-shot winning the Kentucky Derby, in fact, they said it was the longest odds of any winner since 1913. It must have been a surprise to a lot of people, because the Superfecta for the race was something like $1.7 million. Of course, it was no surprise to Bill, who picked Giacomo to win from the moment they introduced the horses at the beginning of the race. Even though he had never heard of the horse before, and knew nothing about his bloodlines or racing history, he said it was obvious as soon as he saw him in comparison to the other horses in the field being led onto the track. He did the same thing with War Emblem, and I admit that I don't know much, but I always know better than to bet against Bill. The big news around here, naturally, was that Yankees owner George Steinbrenner's horse, the favored Bellamy Road, finished badly out of the running, besides his baseball team stinking up the basement of the American League East. I think the Yankees started to win after that, because George told them if they didn't play better, he would make them run in the Preakness instead of Bellamy Road.
Another big day last week was Mother's Day on Sunday, and you know I always say that any day with presents is a good day, and this was no exception. I'm always happy to get music CDs and even more hand-made earrings, and an even bigger surprise was that book of bizarre newspaper stories that I had recommended earlier. This was a surprise not only because I had forgotten all about it somehow, after my glowing review of fulsome praise, but also because there turned out to be a sequel to it, and Bill got them both for me to enjoy twice as much. I'm really looking forward to that. I also got a gift certificate to a local nursery so I can get plants, gardening tools and landscape elements to my heart's content. Let me at those azaleas!
After that, we went to Mom's and had a nice quiet time indoors, as the weather was somewhat changeable during the day. Once again, we had food and presents, which is a combination that I find it hard to improve upon. Mom was happy to get a variety of summer flowers for the garden, like petunias, pansies, Asiatic lilies, begonias and freesias, as well as her favorite Mallomars. She'll be able to enjoy seeing the flowers growing outside from her windows all summer long. The Mets managed to make the hometown fans happy by losing to the Brewers in Milwaukee, so all of the moms at Miller Field had a good day. Although we found ourselves on the road later than we intended to, both coming and going, we didn't run into as much traffic as we feared. We arrived home without incident, and even though the rest of the week was just short of disastrous, it was still a nice Mother's Day.
I'm always bemused when people share their gardening stories with me, and say things like, " ... and it wasn't until I stood up, that I noticed I had been kneeling right in a patch of poison ivy!" Here, they titter sheepishly and shake their heads at the thought of this tiny and adorable poison ivy, that they would just love to pinch its little cheeks and tickle under the chin, it's just so gosh-darned cute. This is what I call "poison ivy for sissies" and everyone knows that I have no truck with it. At our house, the poison ivy comes in only one variety, and there's certainly nothing cute about it. In fact, our rampant mutant alien poison ivy should probably be studied by scientists, except that they don't dare get near it. We find it not only slithering along on the ground hiding beneath our Thorndale ivy, and also climbing up the sides of trees and fences, but also standing straight up in clumps, right in the middle of the lawn, like some new genetically-altered poison ivy bush. The one good thing about it is that there's no way for it to sneak up on anyone, and I never have to worry about accidentally kneeling in a patch of it, because it would be impossible to miss. Of course, we still post signs for unwary visitors and errant delivery people, mostly because their screams tend to keep us awake at night.
Earlier in the week, I happened to be flipping through a fashion catalogue featuring swimsuits for women in a variety of colors and styles. On one page, they were offering an attractive tankini, that came with an accessory they described as a "cover-up skirt." I'll have you know that this item of clothing reached from the model's waist to her crotch, and no further, making me wonder what in the world this "cover-up" was supposed to be covering up, and failing badly at it, I don't mind saying. In my day (of course, this was back when dinosaurs roamed the primordial forests of the unformed land masses) we would consider something of that width to be a belt, and not expect anyone to use it in the manner of a cover-up of any sort. I'd be embarrassed to tell you that they were charging $30 for this thing, and that was on sale!
Speaking of sales, Bill just loves this TV commercial where one of our leading automotive retailers wants us to stop by any of our handy local showrooms so that we don't miss out on what they described as their "once-a-year spring sales event." Well, I hope so! I mean, unless these people are making cars in some bizarro universe where spring occurs more than once a year, it pretty much goes without saying that their spring sales event will only happen once in 2005, or any other year, for that matter. Of course, we mustn't forget that it's a whole new paradigm out there, and one never knows what may be next to come around the pike and slap us in the face. In fact, if the Yankees don't hurry along and start living up to their salaries, I wouldn't be at all surprised to see them running in the Preakness pretty soon. Personally, my money's on Derek Jeter.
Just when we thought it was safe to go outside, along comes another Friday the 13th. Although I suppose we shouldn't complain, because not only is this the first one we've had so far in 2005, but it's actually the only one we're going to have in the entire year. So if you're planning to get out there and break mirrors, walk on cracks and cross in front of black cats or under ladders, you'd better hurry off and do it now, while you've still got the chance. They say that time and tide and bad luck wait for no man, or something like that anyway.
Our spring-like weather continues apace around here, and while the days have been nice enough, it's certainly not what anyone would consider too hot by any means. I was prepared to shoulder the responsibility for the unseasonably cool temperatures, because I lost my head and not only took the flannel sheets off the bed, but the electric blanket as well. You can be sure that I won't be making that mistake in April again, because I've been freezing ever since. However, I have recently heard from someone who certainly should have known better (in fact, it was my sister Linda, who has brains as well as good looks) and nonetheless spent the weekend packing away winter clothes and taking out summer clothes. I don't know about where you are, but in this area, I'd say we should be prepared for another Ice Age to unceremoniously descend upon us.
Last week, we were treated to the unusual spectacle of a long-shot winning the Kentucky Derby, in fact, they said it was the longest odds of any winner since 1913. It must have been a surprise to a lot of people, because the Superfecta for the race was something like $1.7 million. Of course, it was no surprise to Bill, who picked Giacomo to win from the moment they introduced the horses at the beginning of the race. Even though he had never heard of the horse before, and knew nothing about his bloodlines or racing history, he said it was obvious as soon as he saw him in comparison to the other horses in the field being led onto the track. He did the same thing with War Emblem, and I admit that I don't know much, but I always know better than to bet against Bill. The big news around here, naturally, was that Yankees owner George Steinbrenner's horse, the favored Bellamy Road, finished badly out of the running, besides his baseball team stinking up the basement of the American League East. I think the Yankees started to win after that, because George told them if they didn't play better, he would make them run in the Preakness instead of Bellamy Road.
Another big day last week was Mother's Day on Sunday, and you know I always say that any day with presents is a good day, and this was no exception. I'm always happy to get music CDs and even more hand-made earrings, and an even bigger surprise was that book of bizarre newspaper stories that I had recommended earlier. This was a surprise not only because I had forgotten all about it somehow, after my glowing review of fulsome praise, but also because there turned out to be a sequel to it, and Bill got them both for me to enjoy twice as much. I'm really looking forward to that. I also got a gift certificate to a local nursery so I can get plants, gardening tools and landscape elements to my heart's content. Let me at those azaleas!
After that, we went to Mom's and had a nice quiet time indoors, as the weather was somewhat changeable during the day. Once again, we had food and presents, which is a combination that I find it hard to improve upon. Mom was happy to get a variety of summer flowers for the garden, like petunias, pansies, Asiatic lilies, begonias and freesias, as well as her favorite Mallomars. She'll be able to enjoy seeing the flowers growing outside from her windows all summer long. The Mets managed to make the hometown fans happy by losing to the Brewers in Milwaukee, so all of the moms at Miller Field had a good day. Although we found ourselves on the road later than we intended to, both coming and going, we didn't run into as much traffic as we feared. We arrived home without incident, and even though the rest of the week was just short of disastrous, it was still a nice Mother's Day.
I'm always bemused when people share their gardening stories with me, and say things like, " ... and it wasn't until I stood up, that I noticed I had been kneeling right in a patch of poison ivy!" Here, they titter sheepishly and shake their heads at the thought of this tiny and adorable poison ivy, that they would just love to pinch its little cheeks and tickle under the chin, it's just so gosh-darned cute. This is what I call "poison ivy for sissies" and everyone knows that I have no truck with it. At our house, the poison ivy comes in only one variety, and there's certainly nothing cute about it. In fact, our rampant mutant alien poison ivy should probably be studied by scientists, except that they don't dare get near it. We find it not only slithering along on the ground hiding beneath our Thorndale ivy, and also climbing up the sides of trees and fences, but also standing straight up in clumps, right in the middle of the lawn, like some new genetically-altered poison ivy bush. The one good thing about it is that there's no way for it to sneak up on anyone, and I never have to worry about accidentally kneeling in a patch of it, because it would be impossible to miss. Of course, we still post signs for unwary visitors and errant delivery people, mostly because their screams tend to keep us awake at night.
Earlier in the week, I happened to be flipping through a fashion catalogue featuring swimsuits for women in a variety of colors and styles. On one page, they were offering an attractive tankini, that came with an accessory they described as a "cover-up skirt." I'll have you know that this item of clothing reached from the model's waist to her crotch, and no further, making me wonder what in the world this "cover-up" was supposed to be covering up, and failing badly at it, I don't mind saying. In my day (of course, this was back when dinosaurs roamed the primordial forests of the unformed land masses) we would consider something of that width to be a belt, and not expect anyone to use it in the manner of a cover-up of any sort. I'd be embarrassed to tell you that they were charging $30 for this thing, and that was on sale!
Speaking of sales, Bill just loves this TV commercial where one of our leading automotive retailers wants us to stop by any of our handy local showrooms so that we don't miss out on what they described as their "once-a-year spring sales event." Well, I hope so! I mean, unless these people are making cars in some bizarro universe where spring occurs more than once a year, it pretty much goes without saying that their spring sales event will only happen once in 2005, or any other year, for that matter. Of course, we mustn't forget that it's a whole new paradigm out there, and one never knows what may be next to come around the pike and slap us in the face. In fact, if the Yankees don't hurry along and start living up to their salaries, I wouldn't be at all surprised to see them running in the Preakness pretty soon. Personally, my money's on Derek Jeter.
posted by El Tango Fandango @ 6:44 PM
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